GOM

Jan. 18th, 2008 08:11 am
peterbirks: (Default)
[personal profile] peterbirks
Look, we just haven't had enough GOM stuff recently. So, where better to start than the state of the nation's postal service?

Time was, we could claim a postal service second-to-none in the world. Then, as is the way with publicly-owned operations told to perform "profitably", the Post Office showed that it didn't have a clue (if in doubt, blame the government for lack of investment, rather than actually get down to doing things properly) and the whole affair followed that well-trodden disaster route pioneered by the railways and the bus service.

One of the "unintended consequences" of splitting up operations is that it multiplies the opportunity for not-very-good companies to blame someone else. So, when I arrive home on Wednesday to find a note from Parcelforce that they had attempted a delivery. Here's the note that they attached (and you wouldn't believe what problems I've had installing the Scanner onto this machine, just to achieve this simple task. It would have been quicker to photograph it and get it onto the computer that way).

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Note the diligence with which the deliverer has filled out this form. Indeed, try to understand what is going on at all.

So, at 4.30pm the following day, I trek diligently to the Post Office, casually queueing up behind the usual cornucopia of non English-speaking people who want to send parcels to Lithuania, or change their nationality, or whatever.

I hand over the form with my driving licence (you have to provide photographic proof of who you are and a document with your address to prove that you live there. Thankfully -- see earlier post on parking permit -- it doesn't have to be a Council Tax bill).

"Do you still live here?" the woman asks, pointing to the address on the driving licence.

"Yes". I said. (any communication beyond the absolute minimum is utterly fruitless -- you might as well try to engage a security guard at an airport with conversation about the weather).


Out she goes to the back. I wait about five minutes.

Back she comes, empty-handed.

"It hasn't arrived yet. He can come at any time."

"And what time do you close?"

"5.30"

"And it's 4.30 now".

"Yes".

"But the form says I can pick it up on the 16th. It doesn't say "not before 5.30"."

"He shouldn't have written that."

Ahh, the "we can blame someone else" syndrome. Great. Because, of course, Parcelforce is nothing to do with the post Office, now. The Post Office is too busy trying to sell you bBroadband and insurance and credit cards to actually get round to making the delivery of parcels easier.

So, an illiterate fuck from Parcelforce not only fails to write virtually any of the required stuff on a form, but the stuff that he does write, he gets wrong, thus wasting an hour of my day.

One day everyone whose time has been wasted by all of these companies should get together and sue in a class action for lost hours of our lives, valued at, oooh, fifty quid an hour.


And, of course, I still don't know what it is, although I suspect that it's some stuff from Full Tilt. Except, that is, there was another note, this time telling me to go to the Collection sorting office (somewhere else in Lewisham entrely) to pick up a package. Is it a diffferent package? Is it the same one? Who knows. The sorting office closes at 1pm every day, by the way, just in case anyone who actually has a job wants to collect anything.


However, one package that I know that it isn't is a Christmas Present that I ordered on December 3rd from "Easylife", some catalogue company of whom I had never heard, but which had the item I was asked to buy. It arrived yesterday, Jan 17th. Good going. No e-mails from them apologizing for the delay. In fact, I'd just about given up and I was going to order a similar item from elsewhere. Occasionally, Amazon seems like a pargon of excellent service that other companies can only aspire to.

I hope that they don't use Parcelforce.

Date: 2008-01-18 10:07 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bubbles-154.livejournal.com
Just saw this on the LJ latest posts and it reminded me of all the Royal Mail ineptitudes that I've been the subject of. My favourite (and I really wish I'd photographed or scanned it in for evidence) was when I got a letter through my door addressed to County Donegal, Ireland. I live in Lancashire, England! They couldn't even deliver it to the right country, let alone the right house. Did the postman actually bother to look at the address before he popped the envelope through my door, or was that too much to ask?

Date: 2008-01-18 10:32 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
I thought GOM stood for Gulf of Mexico. I have no idea what you mean by it though.

With regards to the rest of your post, get things delivered to your office. I had all my parcels delivered to the efficient post room at Reuters. They even paid the customs duty for me when I had things delivered from the US.

Date: 2008-01-18 10:45 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] peterbirks.livejournal.com
I do tend to get a majority of my stuff delivered to my office. The exceptions are (a) stuff too heavy to carry home on the train and (b) stuff where you tend to have problems if the delivery address is different from your registered address with the delivering company.

In the case of poker sites, you only cause problems for yourself if you start requesting a different delivery address, because they are (rightly) very concerned about fraud and account hi-jacking. Then again, I've emptied the account, so I suppose that it wouldn't be that much of a problem.

PJ

GOM? Ahhh, I'm not telling. All those in the know will be aware (revenge against all those international posts that use abbreviations that it took me ages to work out, like TPAs and the like) Eventually it should become clear...

Date: 2008-01-18 11:13 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
Grumpy Old Man, LDO.

Date: 2008-01-18 11:54 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jellymillion.livejournal.com
Apart from the occasional inexplicable delay in actually getting stock of something, Amazon remain head and shoulders above most etailers in my book. I do however live in fear that they'll stop using the Royal Mail for the final mile . I don't care who gets it to the sorting office, I just want my postman to deliver the thing, rather than having to drive 17 miles to some industrial estate on the other side of London. And our regular postie is very good with slipping widish flattish stuff under the mat* rather than taking it back to the depot to be lost.

Parcelforce are arses. pARSElforce, that's them.


* The front door is a fair bit back from the road, so we don't worry too much about light-fingered passers-by. And we explicitly asked him to leave stuff wherever possible.

Date: 2008-01-18 12:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] peterbirks.livejournal.com
Oddities. I've been productive. I've picked up the mail item (Full Tilt Poker Strategy Guide) and the parcel (Sennheiser headphones) and bought 10 green refuse sacks (available only from the Lewisham Library, Reference section -- god bless local government).

The parcel has a receipt time from the post office. Parcelforce delivered it at 2.26pm on the 16th, two hours before I went there to collect it.

So, not only were Parcelforce incorrect in saying that I could pick it up anytime on the 16th, but the Post Office were wrong in that they denied being in possession of something that actually had arrived. If I'd had time to spare, I really ought to have spoken to the manager about that.



PJ

It's better oop North

Date: 2008-01-18 01:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] geoffchall.livejournal.com
Well probably not, but I have to write in support of some postal services. Our postman, Lee is an absolute 5 star hero. Not only is he pleasant, prompt and willing to drag sackloads of mail up two flights of stairs, but he checks with us at this time of year when we're going to be in the office Saturdays.

Even more startling, he diverts parcels that have been addressed to our house and drops them in at the office unless it's a Wednesday and addressed to Julie in which case, he knows she's not in work that day and ensures it goes to the house. The man is an absolute marvel.

Knowing the postman is the key

Date: 2008-01-18 01:47 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
I live on a bizarrely numbered street which starts with 2a, 4a, up to 16a and then starts again with 2, 4, etc. (Built in 2 different stages). Of course, over the years, houses 2-16 have generally been converted into flats, which are numbered 2a, 2b etc. So there are multiple houses with the same address in the street.

Our regular postman knows who lives where and it works well. Anyone else (holiday relief, couriers, delivery companies, take-away food people etc.), always goes to the wrong door.

Amazon use Royal Mail for lots of stuff, but not everything. I paid extra for express delivery of my son's xbox before Christmas. It was sent by Business Link who twice tried to deliver it to the other address over a weekend without updating their parcel tracking website. Net result was a 15 mile drive to Barking to pick it up from an industrial estate (they only make 2 delivery attempts). And then I had an encounter with Amazon's Indian call centre. Their systems were so slow that the call centre person kept pressing the refund button resulting in 3 refunds of the delivery charge to my credit card, which at least covered the petrol of driving to Barking and back.

Matt Harrison

Date: 2008-01-19 07:53 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bubbles-154.livejournal.com
Maybe all my problems have been created by the holiday relief. At one point, I got so fed up of receiving letters for the wrong address, and having to re-deliver them myself, that I called the postman back one day to take the letter back and deliver it correctly. He wasn't impressed, but I didn't care. The conversation went something like this:

Me: "Excuse me, but this letter is for the house across the road, not this one"

Him: "What does it say on the envelope?"

Me: "It says it's for the house across the road."

Him: "Nnnnh", while grudgingly taking the letter back.

It was only a small victory for me, and it didn't stop me getting the wrong mail, but it made me feel better at the time.

Just a word about Easylife

Date: 2008-08-20 10:43 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
I actually work for USEL, who run Easylife and several other companies. I'm not in the slightest bit surprised to hear how long the item took to get to you - sad to say that, yes, they are absolutely terrible! Half the items are always out of stock, yet they continue to keep advertising them and take orders for them. Lack of stock, plus the fact that they don't send out part orders, means there's no way they can adhere to the 72-hour dispatch time they promise. They're extremely poor at keeping customers informed about things, and I've even known orders to be automatically cancelled if there were problems with the card details, and even then the customer is never informed that there was ever a problem in the first place!

I'm ashamed to say that my need for money currently outweighs my sense of ethics. But take it from someone with the inside knowledge - you should avoid Easylife (and any company based at Euro House, Cremers Road, Sittingbourne) at all costs!

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