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Party No Party
Apr. 24th, 2008 08:57 amAlmost a year to the day since my broadband, and then my phone line, went down, the broadband went down again yesterday. Thus ensued a repeat hour and a quarter talking to the Asian sub-continuent, except that this time I have history on my side. Every time they say to me "everything is fine with the connection", I can say "that's what you said last time".
The "Advanced Diagnostics" are being undertaken at the moment, I am assured. I will then receive a phone call telling me that the advanced diagnostics reveal no fault, even though I know that there is a fault, and that there is nothing wrong with my equipment. This will result in a miscommunication, because the speaker will think that he is supplying me with an answer, whereas, to me, it's merely a statement that "we can't solve the problem".
So, my response will be:
1) What do you propose to do next?
This will normally elicit the response "Let me explain to you Mr Birks..." after which the previous gumph and bullshit I have been fed will be repeated in a different form.
But, once again, I'm ready for them this time. Indeed, I was ready for it last night, when I simply said "I heard what you said. I understood it. Do you have anything new to add to what you just said?"
At which point he gave up and said that he would get someone else to look at it and that I would be contacted soon.
It normally takes about five calls before the situation is reached where I get them to offer to send round an engineer (who will then have to go to the exchange, because that is where the fault is) and they threaten me with a £200 bill if the fault turns out to be with my equipment.
The farce of this is that it is astoundingly bad business because, not only does it piss me off, but it doesn't make them any money, because the fault isn't with my equipment. Stupid, or what?
The whole thing could have an effect on my bonus timetable at BetFred and NoIQ, where I am close to retaining my VIP levels on both for the month, but not quite there. And I'm away for a couple of days from Saturday. And no reload bonus from betftred this month! That's another cash cow that's vanished.
It's a bit of a pisser.
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The "Advanced Diagnostics" are being undertaken at the moment, I am assured. I will then receive a phone call telling me that the advanced diagnostics reveal no fault, even though I know that there is a fault, and that there is nothing wrong with my equipment. This will result in a miscommunication, because the speaker will think that he is supplying me with an answer, whereas, to me, it's merely a statement that "we can't solve the problem".
So, my response will be:
1) What do you propose to do next?
This will normally elicit the response "Let me explain to you Mr Birks..." after which the previous gumph and bullshit I have been fed will be repeated in a different form.
But, once again, I'm ready for them this time. Indeed, I was ready for it last night, when I simply said "I heard what you said. I understood it. Do you have anything new to add to what you just said?"
At which point he gave up and said that he would get someone else to look at it and that I would be contacted soon.
It normally takes about five calls before the situation is reached where I get them to offer to send round an engineer (who will then have to go to the exchange, because that is where the fault is) and they threaten me with a £200 bill if the fault turns out to be with my equipment.
The farce of this is that it is astoundingly bad business because, not only does it piss me off, but it doesn't make them any money, because the fault isn't with my equipment. Stupid, or what?
The whole thing could have an effect on my bonus timetable at BetFred and NoIQ, where I am close to retaining my VIP levels on both for the month, but not quite there. And I'm away for a couple of days from Saturday. And no reload bonus from betftred this month! That's another cash cow that's vanished.
It's a bit of a pisser.
_____________
